In late 2011, I got very sick with a brain infection which lead to my brain having to work out how to do certain things again. After a few months off work I went back and expected everything to go back to normal but they didn’t. I started getting the worst headaches, dizziness, became very sensitive to noise, the most tired you could possibly be and ended up back in hospital. All the tests were done and many doctors thought it was post-encephalitic headaches which would of made a lot of sense. When it was still going on a year later, I was sent to another doctor which took a look at me and told me that what I had was M.E. M.E is a little bit of an odd duck, it’s not life threatening but is completely life altering and can make you feel a little bit crazy because many of the symptoms are pretty invisible things such as muscle weakness, severe headaches, exhaustion as well as fasciculations (twitching of the muscles), clumsiness, brain fog, not being able to find words, panic attacks, inability to plan or organise, chest pain, anxiety and depression it’s a real little rollercoaster!
For the last two years I’ve sinked in and out of a major M.E crash but I’m finally learning to adapt to my illness and feel like I am in control of it instead of it being in control of me. Which is really amazing! Some crashes can last weeks, some can last months and others can last years and years and although there will probably be another right now I’m feeling really pretty lovely. Most of the time!
With all the extra time I’ve had on my hands I wanted to start something that made me feel a little alive, something that was helping others as well as myself so I started my project One Million Lovely Letters. I know in our worst moments, sometimes it only takes one person to make you feel like you belong – to remind you how incredible you are and I hope that’s what I and my one million lovely letters can do.
If you would like a letter, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Please include your address and why you would like one, for example:
“I’m feeling a little glum”
anything really, just why you need a little cheering up or a reminder that actually you are really lovely.